Tuesday, December 06, 2011

2D Plane Wave, y=Acos(kr-kvt)

Im starting to get the hang of this 3d plotting, I think Im gonna build a career out of it. lol. But it's really fun to finally have the power to put into visualization all these Physics equations we've been dealing since since. Coded in Python Mayavi.

Saturday, December 03, 2011

Mayavi is My Bitch: What I've been doing lately at the expense of my weekends.

What I've been doing lately at the expense of my weekends! By the way, this is the very first gif I've made and it was from a mesh program I did thru Python Mayavi. Codes are from manual. I just thought the animation is cool. It's why I'm posting this here for the lack of anything else interesting to post. I'm trying to mesh a stereographic profile of a pyramid-textured silicon. Hopefully, that's the next stuff I'll be posting here if the thesis regulations allow it. That's it for today. Back to my robot ways. 101010101010. Exterminate! Exterminate!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Testicles and Painkillers

I was trying to sort the big deals out of an uneventful week and all I can recall was me thinking last Friday that during that day, had I been able to, I would've murdered 6 or 7 people. That would include that woman I sat beside the jeepney; she was bitchy! The other two would've been the fat guys who had to really squeeze me in my seat at the train ride. It was apparently the point I started feeling pain from my crotch. Another one would be the donut vendor who won't sell donuts coz she didn't have change. And the rest would be the surplus. These people, really!

There was no way I could have turned that day around, instead I ended up with a very painful pair of testicles.

I planned this day ahead to be in an extraordinary level of brightness. I would've have worn a pair of red pants topped with a gayish shirt. But then the day before was a disappointment that creeped its way into the next day.

That's how unremarkable this week have been save for the failed experiments for thesis which will most likely continue until next week. My creativity couldn't even save this entry. This will probably go down as my worst ever.

Anyhow, I just wanted to write something about, while waiting for the Heroes Season 2 to complete download.

And oh!, did I mention I ended up having painful testicles?

Saturday, November 12, 2011

The Letter That Sends You Off To Litters

So a few days ago, I was bored and me getting bored is so mental. I tend to compose a lot of philosophical and scientific essays in my head. So a few days ago I just thought of a someone from my past. It was a bittersweet affair and didn't end nicely that for the past two or three years I still think about that person. So you know what they say about letting it all go shizz. So I tried putting into words what I have been trying to say for the past few years. Not that I want him to ever read this but I just wanted to feel to really let go this time and find my own peace of mind. After all, it's been so many years and I have to move on in the most genuine sense this time. And true enough, the day after I wrote it, I'm off the hook. I couldn't even remember a word from the letter I wrote. So there my love lost goes. I hope this letter really seals this segment of my life for good.

Dear C.

I know this is an age-old topic that i should have just forgotten a long time ago but once and for all I am putting a close to everything with this semi-indulgent letter. But I don't wish this to reach you and I hope you don't ever read it. And by the way, the me so obsessed with very organized literary compositions will not be in this letter. After all, I am just trying to put into words what I have been thinking for so many years. So here it goes.

For the longest time I have been dodging feelings for other people. I felt I owe it to the humankind to have one less messy relationship to keep things in order. But when you came around my scarcely remarkable life, I felt a little more brightness and a little less sadness. With you trying to distract me for attention, I felt a little special. The me so naive and inexperienced with interhuman affection misinterpreted every little attention you've shown me. We flirted a little and I went psycho about it and I thought it was love. So I guess that scared you off. So when you just walked out, I really felt shit and almost suicidal. Using your own words of me, "you're so full of yourself." If you haven't figured it out yet, you were the first person ever I thought I'd pursue having a relationship with. After you left I thought I was gonna be fine and live on. But no. The thing with this whole ordeal with love lost is you can deny all you want and try not to think what you've done wrong to push people away. But then you get a lot of time alone and you unwantingly sink into thinking again. Yes, I cried once or probably more. I thought I was a strong person but I guess I just loved you a little more than I should have. There were just things about you that are special to me. You were the kind of person I imagined riding into the sunset with. I guess I was really broken by the things that I never wanted to happen. So this appallingly crazy person me went into this empty sex with a stranger that I don't even remember the face of, thinking I'm doing myself healing.

From then on I never had sex with anyone. I guess it took me a regretable one to realize that this ridiculous cliche about making love only for love is rather not so ridiculous at all. Anyway, the point of this letter is just to get these thoughts off my head. Two or three years have passed and somehow i still wonder of the things that might have been. But things have changed and I feel like I've lost some things along the way. And if there's anything at all that I've learned during the entire process, it is that nothing in this life is really that fairy tale easy. I guess it's just so human nature for people to hurt other people. So I think Im gonna stay single for a long time, not that there's been any offer. But the point is I guess I've grown too much to be part of this whole human ordeal. Or now that I thought of it, I think I've just really grown this "stay away from me" aura. I've kinda grown to accept that there's no way our kind of relationship can have a rainbow happy ending. It might just be me though. As for you, I would like to thank you for that lady gaga scribble you wrote for me. Now that I look back at it, i regret feeding it off the shredder. I would also like to thank you for the life-changing experience that it has been. The whole heartbreak process probably killed me for a few hours and scarred me for some months. But, cliche as it may sound, it has taught me to grow a new kind of bone that helped me accept things the way they are. Now Im settled in my pathetic and mediocre career but I am living and I am content. Though it's what everyone else is after, I will not be chasing my happy ending anytime soon. So I am hoping all the best for you and your life. I hope that by writing this letter, I have shaken you off my mind and my heart. I love you and always will. And just like I told you the last time, "See you again when we're all cats!"


PS: I wrote this in British accent.

Saturday, June 04, 2011

There Goes My Shit

This is 1996. Ewan McGregor. In his younger years. In the "worst toilet in Scotland". The name of the film: "Trainspotting". By Danny Boyle. Remember 127 Hours? Slumdog Millionaire? Yep! That's him. He was at the helm in probably one of the more critically acclaimed films in UK (all-time).

After this frame, Ewan did something even more grotesque. Review next.

Thursday, April 07, 2011

Falling Down [Lyrics]

So there's this one Korean - Chinese film (in millions I've seen this week) named "A Good Rain Knows When To Come" or (in some other territories) "Season of Rain" directed by Hur Jin-ho, which I really like. I was in a Korean cinema marathon mode this week and the reason I came across this film is Jung Woo Sung, who played one of the protagonists. For some reason, it had the feel of Sofia Coppola's "Lost in Translation", which appeals to my bias towards works that don't shout their message out too loud. Yes, the movie was quiet, not to mention awkward, because the English the chararacters speak are Korean and Chinese sorts. But the film is rich in green-ness and spring rain of Chengdu (a city/town in China), which provides a refreshing backdrop to a not-so-easy love story. All in all, the film just opens up again an unfinished affair between lovers only to leave it open again though not without confrontation. But there are days in one's life that a person wish for rain to come. And for a Chengdu girl, the coming of the spring rain is just what she needed.

Anyway, I was not gonna make a review for this film and the only reason for this post is that the film had a really nice scoring and soundtrack. And yes, I'm a sucker for films with great music. (Remember 'The Hours'? 'Atonement'?)
It's just a shame that when I googled the lyrics for Jo Sung Bin's "Falling Down", an original song from the film, there's not a page that has it. So I listened to the song some 4-6 times, not without efforts, to come up with a lyrics page. So to whoever come across the film "A Good Rain Knows When To Come" and find it great, I hope this page shows up when you google the OST:

[Lyrics] Falling Down by Jo Sung Bin

Maybe sometime
I could be here again
trying to find love
we don't know yet.

Maybe is something
to make us come around,
the rain will be something
to let me calm down.

There is silence
flowing around me
in the air
when you approach.

Maybe it's something
to make you turn around,
the raining is something
just holding me now.

I know that you wonder
where we stay around.
Maybe I found you
always here in my mind.

It's falling around me.
I'm feeling like lost in time.
I'm waiting behind you.
Just don't let me down.

You're running away now.
You're sinking in flowing time.
The raining reminds me of your smile.
Don't bring me down.

(PS: I find some of the words funny too. Regardless, the song is still a beauty. It can be my hearing though.)